Anyone Still There?

*A note from the writer* I started this blog nearly ten years ago along with my stent as a freelance writer for a local publication here in my hometown; “The Evening Whirl”. My “career” as a blogger started out as something just for fun, but my journey as a writer began as therapy. When I was a fifteen years old and a freshman in high school my father dropped dead from a heart attack at the age of thirty-six. I had just spoken to him only hours earlier and he was ok. When I lost my daddy I lost a piece of me and I turned inward; I was sad. It wasn’t until my ninth grade English teacher told me that I needed to figure out how to channel all I was feeling into something worth while; he told me to write. And so I did, hence the start of my journey. That was well over nineteen years ago. For a long time I used writing as my tool to get my point across. Not to anyone in particular but just to let it out. And then I stopped! Literally just stopped, the last post on this blog is from December 2016; nearly two years ago. When I stopped writing I starting hurting myself, both in a physical and mental way. Instead of using my outlet in times of stress or crisis I began to hold everything in until I would explode. But not only that, I’d become so lost in myself and self pity that I lost myself (does that make sense? I hope it makes sense). My identity had changed hands, I was now a wife, a mother on a crusade for justice for her son, a friend, a daughter, an advocate for mental illness and  I forgot who I really was, who I was really born to be; a writer.

The title of this post is “Anyone Still There?” but really the question is rhetorical because I don’t care if one or one thousand people read this blog I’m not doing it for them, I’m doing it for me. However, if in the process the right pair of eyes should come in contact with this content know that you are not alone. I’m here with you. This is the first day of doing something again for the first time. Thank you for reading. ~B

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Liquid Frosting X Brendolyn Marie

I had the opportunity to sit down with ShowYouStl.com to talk about my vegan nail polish line Liquid Frosting Nail Color as well as to talk a little bit more about myself ; kind of tell my story. Here it is…

Shout out to Jasmine for these amazing photos and this awesome interview!! You rock girlfriend!

http://www.showyoustl.com/2016/10/brendolyn-royal-liquid-frosting-nail.html

 

Frida Kahlo to Marty McConnell

frida-11“leaving is not enough; you must
stay gone. train your heart
like a dog. change the locks
even on the house he’s never
visited. you lucky, lucky girl.
you have an apartment
just your size. a bathtub
full of tea. a heart the size
of Arizona, but not nearly
so arid. don’t wish away
your cracked past, your
crooked toes, your problems
are paper mache puppets
you made or bought because the vendor
at the market was so compelling you just
had to have them. you had to have him.
and you did. and now you pull down
the bridge between your houses.
you make him call before
he visits. you take a lover
for granted, you take
a lover who looks at you
like maybe you are magic. make
the first bottle you consume
in this place a relic. place it
on whatever altar you fashion
with a knife and five cranberries.
don’t lose too much weight.
stupid girls are always trying
to disappear as revenge. and you
are not stupid. you loved a man
with more hands than a parade
of beggars, and here you stand. heart
like a four-poster bed. heart like a canvas.
heart leaking something so strong
they can smell it in the street.”

*I wanted to share this for many reasons. When dealing with relationships over any nature as women we tend to be thought of as the weaker, believing that no matter what we will always come back. This poem is the epitome of strength and it drips self worth! Be strong, Be Bold Be Beautiful!” ~B

9 Things You Need To Know Before Dating The Girl Who has Always Been Single

*I’ve been single for a very long time and this post hit the nail right on the head!* This is a must read

 

She’s had plenty of people come into her life and leave unannounced. She might have feelings about certain things that she will compress until she is more comfortable around you because she doesn’t…

Source: 9 Things You Need To Know Before Dating The Girl Who has Always Been Single